Overkill

I am re-evaluating my whole "dating will be fun" notion. The novelty is wearing off already. Maybe it was just a bit too much all at once. I was all excited to meet different people, be open-minded and all that. So when asked out by people that seemed nice, I decided what the hell, sure! So this week I went on three dates. I think in the past 10 years I’ve probably only gone on three dates! The first, well I already wrote about that glorious success story. The second isn’t story-worthy as the guy was perfectly nice, normal and funny, but I wasn’t attracted to him. And the third was really fun, I had a great time, but I think it’s more of a friend vibe I feel. Oh, and I met someone else the other night and said they could call me. This is all fantastic for my ego and everything, but it’s not giving me the giddy butterflies I thought it would.

My friend and I said it was like being on a raft, drifting at sea, and you think how great it would be to get to dry land with all the possibilities that it holds. But then you get there, and it’s not so great. And I kind of miss being on my raft, with nothing to worry about, it’s calm and easy and I’m used to it. Why did I want to leave the raft anyway? I like the raft!

Anyway, I’m not sure how to abort this experiment. I wasn’t able to vocalize my indifference properly, so when they said they had a good time, could we do it again… all I could say was "sure". But I don’t wanna, I want back on my raft!!!